Warning: This entry has nothing to do with Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, which I did see this weekend but did not very much enjoy. Gene Wilder will always be Willy Wonka to me.
At some point in my childhood, I began to dream about Judgement Day--that wonderful event where God determines if you're naughty or nice, worthy of Heaven or destined for Hell. How it happened varied; sometimes, all the lights would blow out and everyone would gather in their backyards, where lifespans of mistakes would appear on a huge TV for all of humanity to see. Others? Well, I can't remember others. Last night, though, I had a new version involving Johnny Depp and the Super Target near my house.
I think we knew it was coming. Luke was there, along with This Gal, Reggie from All My Children (apparently a good friend of mine), and dozens of other shoppers, all of us attempting to stock our refrigerators with supplies. Maybe in case It happened and we weren't armed with enough ho-hos to make it through the judging part. I was in the chip aisle (which of course is right next to frozen foods) when a huge wave of water suddenly flooded the aisles and started carrying people away. But it was a selective carrying away. The first wave went over everyone, but only certain people went with it. This Gal was one of the first to go (sorry, This Gal), and all I could was watch. Didn't reach out my hand or anything. Reggie? No more acting jobs for him. Luke was one of the last. We were holding on to each other when the water pulled him in. At that point I started to pray, but then it was over and only a handful of individuals were left. Then, suddenly, Johnny Depp. Coming up to me, holding on to me, his demeanor making it clear he was the cause of the water and the reason I was now alone.
His tone of voice was seductive, his eyes piercing, his sense was familiar. Not sensual, but hypnotic. Not what I expected of the Devil. He knew I was upset when he said I needed to go home with him, and he knew I was trying not to show it, though I did ask if it was OK to cry. He didn't answer. I didn't cry. I tried to act brave by pulling out bags of chocolate and peanut butter Nestle chips and eating right out of the package. I went home with him. Chris visited us. I remember wanting to escape and hoping he didn't feel it. And then I woke up.
My subconscious is constantly bringing to life the scenarios I am most afraid of. During the day, I do silly things like will for dolls to blink or smile at me, daring them to reveal their evil selves. In my dreams, I do these things and they happen. Last night it happened twice. One doll was as big as those life-sized Barbies popular about five years ago, but she didn't catch me. It also happened with a doll made of flannel. Luke grabbed her hands, and she didn't come to life until I started cutting her with scissors. Go me.
WHY do I freak myself out like this? Because my grandmother taught me I could go to Hell at any moment? I'm unsure of what God really wants? Early exposure to bad movies? If you have any ideas, feel free to pass it on. Or just say something funny so these images won't be burned into my brain.
Sounds like Johnny Depp needs an posterior-kicking. That's what it sounds like to me.
Posted by: Luke | July 22, 2005 at 01:41 AM
Did you happen to get Reggie to shave that nasty peach fuzz thing he's got growing on his upper lip?
Came here through Amalah's blog, I read your comment and it cracked me up and made me laugh out loud! You a funny lady!
Posted by: PaintingChef | July 22, 2005 at 02:17 PM
What is it with you and the frozen foods section and crazy dolls? Imitations of love and babies?
And Johnny Depp and chocolate chips? Sounds like either comfort food for your fear, or giving into indulgence and temptation (since he was the candy man, who "mixes it with love and makes the world taste good").
The flood and the sweeping away sound to me like you might have a fear of being alone (maybe because you think your friends will leave you becaue of something that you might do), or that those close to you will go by the wayside and leave you with only yourself, some movies, and comfort foods.
But This Gal says that ain't gonna happen anyway. ;)
If it makes you feel better, I had a crazy dream last night, where there was a child who had a curved white, wire hanger for a head. (true story)
"No more wire hangers!"
Posted by: This Gal | July 22, 2005 at 04:36 PM
Mommy Dearest!!! yes!
Posted by: Becky | July 22, 2005 at 09:08 PM
Dearest Frema,
Now, I can see the connection, those greedy children from the chocolate factory do get their come-uppance. No wonder, our little Matthew was frightened by the Oompa-loompa song. He understood that judgement day metaphor at such a young age. And, I thought that the movie was a harmless children's yarn.
You should be fair-warned not to watch "Darby O'Gill and the Little People", which is the ultimate in scary movies complete with banshees and Death personified as the driver of some horse-driven death carriage. This Disney movie frightened little Molly for months or maybe years.
I am not sure of what God exactly wants either; however, this all has to be more than just avoiding Hell. (otherwise in a some sad way our emphasis is more on Hell than the good stuff)
Molly
Posted by: Anonymous | July 23, 2005 at 10:38 AM
Hey Frema-
Glad you graduated from DPU. I did as well, and am in the process of moving to Wisconsin to further my career. Sound strange? I thought it did.
Anyway, I agree that Gene Wilder will always be W.W. to me. As a child of the 1980's, no-one can replace the original.
I think that the new movie needed a director other than Tim Burton. I would suggest Martin Scorsese. Make it a tough film about the chocolate mafia.
Anyway, great site and 10-10 and listening in.
Posted by: Will Shannon | July 27, 2005 at 04:35 AM