In honor of 1992, I'd like to say, Boy, do I feel salty.
I wrote the first couple of sentences leading into yesterday's entry mainly as a joke, to point out the types of things people are willing to comment on, so imagine my surprise when you all felt you had to defend yourselves for not announcing your presence. However, another part of me was looking forward to seeing what kinds of comments the soul-baring might bring about, like maybe other married people would share the thoughts THEY had running through their heads when they were getting ready for the altar, or what they thought about those close to them when they went through it, and I kind of hoped my comments section would bear witness to some sort of Lifetime love fest with all the relating and the reflecting and the wisdom-sharing, so I was a little bummed when that didn't happen. Anyway, didn't mean to call you out, homies. That's what DeLurking Week is for, and you all did wonderfully for that. I don't think I ever actually said thanks for reading, so seriously, thanks for reading. I love those of you who visit and say nice things, and even those who say snotty things, because it means somebody's paying attention.
In the almost two years that I've been maintaining this site, I have been transformed. Before I knew blogs existed, I had dreams of writing but no motivation to do so. What was the point in pouring energy into a first draft that would need countless revisions when I had no way to share it with anyone short of a book deal? If I was only in this for myself, I'd be content just listening to the tangents that run through my head all day long. This Web site allows me to make myself heard, so there are no excuses. It's write or bust.
And for the most part, I do. Incidents that were once dedicated to a few lines in e-mails to friends are now fodder for Internet comedy. Now I have a reason to bother tackling deep thoughts once deemed too hard to verbalize. Now I can make them tangible to the entire world. For the first time in my life, I feel like I have a real shot at achieving my dream of becoming a published writer, even if "publishing" means nothing more than hitting a button in my Blogger account so that my "essays" can be sought after by those with PC access and a few spare minutes to kill every other day.
Today I'm slightly nervous about the state of my blog, seeing as it's 99 percent likely that Amalah will answer the question I submitted in July for her Wednesday Advice Smackdown, and her Web site is to me what Ann M. Martin is to children's literature and pre-teen baby-sitters born after 1980. I feel like I need to do something special in case she stops by, like blow out my Internet hair and pick out the broccoli that's stuck between my two front Internet teeth.
Except that broccoli will never get stuck between my teeth. I hate broccoli.
...and keep on blogging - because you really are so so good at it. I find myself reloading you every time I sit down at the computer. :0)
And waving over here - hi Amalah, should you stop by AND get interested in Frema's comment section, I'm a big fan too.
Posted by: Lost a Sock | February 08, 2006 at 12:01 PM
Are you sure you hate broccoli?
There are several things that you claim to hate that other times you will admit you've never even tried.
Posted by: Luke | February 08, 2006 at 04:23 PM
Because of you, I had the courage to use the internet as a creative outlet. Plus, I have "met" several new people, even if only by coming to know them through their posts. Your personal insight was heartwarming and I loved it, but I tend to only comment, if at all, on funny things as I do not want to trample on someones feelings through accidental "foot-in-mouth" comments. I am so glad you are a blogger and I love your witty thoughts and emotional sharing. Thanks for being "out there" in internetland and connecting me to others. No matter who looks at this blog or when you become "paper" published you are tops in mine and lots of others day and reading.
Posted by: PJ Librarian | February 08, 2006 at 04:28 PM
Just a side note to Frema and Luke, broccoli can be good, if it is on someone else's plate. Plus, your little niece has had a tummy ache for the last two nights, since we fed her the broccoli/chicken pureed food. So, even though I will eat it on a salad or with lots of ranch dressing, broccoli rates up there with a "don't do it".
Posted by: PJ Librarian | February 08, 2006 at 04:31 PM
You are my Amalah. ;)
Posted by: Sambo V. | February 08, 2006 at 08:56 PM
Thanks to you blogging, which rubbed onto Number Twelve, I now blog and I had no idea what blogging was. I only hope to get better.
Posted by: butterflygirl | February 09, 2006 at 12:13 AM
Blogging does kind of give you a different outlook on things, I've learned that in the past year.
Oh, and don't stress about the broccoli...but you may want to double check for the spinach. But have no fear, your blog-girlfriends will let you know, as your real life girlfriends would, when you have something in your teeth. For the record, you don't. Your writing, is, as always, flawless and enjoyable!
Also? I heart Amalah a little too and when she linked to me I think I piddled a little...
Posted by: PaintingChef | February 10, 2006 at 05:37 PM