A big thanks to everyone who had kind words to say after my last entry. I've been so caught up in which religious label to stamp on my soul that I forgot to ask why it was so important to stick to just one. No matter what church Luke and I choose to attend, there's no reason I can't take along all those aspects of Catholicism that have made a wonderful impact on my life. Which brings me to my next point: in no way was I trying to bash the Catholic Church or those who consider themselves practicing Catholics. First of all, I'm not so naive as to believe I'd be participating in such an uncomfortable process if my husband* were Catholic. Second, while there are teachings I don't agree with, there are many I still hold close to my heart. Just because I'm considering a membership with a Protestant denomination doesn't mean I'm eliminating the Hail Mary from my prayer ritual, rejecting the Sign of the Cross, or renouncing the saints as strong models of Christian life. There are also countless beliefs I was introduced to through the church that, while not exclusive to Catholics, have instilled in me a pride and fondness for my childhood faith: the sanctity of life; the inherent dignity of every human being; our responsibility to those less fortunate; the importance of family. For those and many other reasons, I will always consider myself Catholic. I will always be proud of where I came from.
I will also use this experience to teach my children how important it is love and honor God in a way that best encourages them to follow His ultimate teaching: to love Him and His people. They will not be intimidated into faith with threatening tales of demons tearing through the earth's surface to snatch bad little girls who fought with their sister before 10:30 Mass. They will not be afraid to sleep with their feet outside the covers because the devil might take it as a sign of their willingness to cross through the gates of Hell. If they're gonna be afraid of anything, it'll be Mommy's unforgivable habit of exploiting Private Moments such as our first sex talk on the Internet.
* Look at me, bein' all casual and nonchalant about the fact that I HAVE A HUSBAND! HOORAY FOR ME!
The best of all faiths should be valued. A person once said about looking for church value in this way: "Don't go and dig 10 6 foot wells looking for water. Just dig one 60 foot well and the chances of get water are much greater."
The past has value and is the base for the future. One does not start over. One continues forword. Working on the relationship makes it happen for the both of you.
Posted by: daddy d | May 31, 2006 at 12:41 AM
Excellent discussion Frema, we all need to value the positive parts of our lives whether the part that involves religious experience or not. Threatening tales of demons and the devil only creates a Hell on Earth.
I am sure that our grandchidren are in good hands.
Posted by: mjd | May 31, 2006 at 01:06 AM
And I have a wife whom I am both proud and happy to be with.
Posted by: Luke | May 31, 2006 at 01:13 AM
Frema girl, I have been there. I know exactly how you feel. Catholicism just wasn't for me anymore. My parents have finally accepted my decision and support my involvement as well as my son's. You'll make the right choices.
Posted by: butterflygirl | May 31, 2006 at 01:29 AM
I am glad you decided to share your journey through all of this. It's very important for all of us, no matter what religion we are, to stop and look at who we are, what we believe, and why every once and a while. If we never became uncomfortable, we would not make very much progress. We all know you're not a Catholic basher. Just a girl on a mission to find the right blend of religion to settle down in. And you will. :0)
Posted by: Lost a Sock | May 31, 2006 at 02:44 AM
Why have a religion at all? just be happy with yourself! you made great choices so far, do you REALLY think you will go to hell? Is there a hell? no one knows for sure. Let your kids grow up and decide what religion they want to be for themselves.
just a thought. (and that would kill the beast for sure!)
Auntie Di (from the other side)
Posted by: Anonymous | May 31, 2006 at 11:00 AM
Well thoughout and thoughtfully said.
Posted by: PJ Librarian | May 31, 2006 at 02:32 PM
I know you and Luke will be wonderful parents. I've told you before and I'll tell you again how much I admire the fact that you two are looking so closely at religion. Your unborn children are so blessed! ;)
Posted by: Sambo V. | June 04, 2006 at 04:41 PM