The Money Pit

When Luke scored his new job back in August, I had big plans for our financial future. Since we were already "making do" on my salary, I figured his paycheck would provide us with a chance to catch up on our plans to pay off my car and save for a house. We would pay off the remaining twelve thousand dollars on the Cobalt by February, then designate the extra three hundred bucks a month into our savings account, which would allow us to become homeowners by the time our lease ended in June. We would replace Luke's dying 1993 Lumina with a Pontiac Vibe or something equally family-friendly by summer, get knocked up on our first try in the fall, and spend the duration of my pregnancy accruing a sizable nest egg to fall back on once I quit my job to raise our baby. Lucy would be born in my twenty-eighth year (hooray for major events falling on even numbers!), and of course her birth wouldn't cost one out-of-pocket penny because of our diligence in contributing to my tax-free health savings account. I can see the white picket fence from here, can't you?

Now it's five months later, and the Lumina is still chugging along. My plan, sadly, is not.

The first glitch took place in November, when both Luke and I were greeted with flat tires on each of our cars--ON THE SAME DAY--moments before we were supposed to leave for work. We went to the dentist, where we learned we'll be forking over and arm and a leg for cavity fillings (both), post implants (me), minor gum surgery (Luke), and wisdom-teeth extraction (Luke again) (This is what happens when your husband visits the dentist after a TWELVE-YEAR hiatus). We paid little mind to the amount spent on gifts and charitable contributions over the holidays, and since we were home for so little of December, we wrote off trips to the grocery store, instead opting for nights of KFC, Steak 'n Shake, and Qdoba. Let's also not forget my trips to the salon for "necessary" cut-and-colors, self-indulgent shoe shopping, and the amount of moola it took to validate my online identity with a long-desired upgrade, which was about a hundred and seventy dollars, because I thought it made much better sense to pay for a year with TypePad upfront because I'm a sucker for "one-month free!" deals and prefer paying things off in one lump sum than needlessly writing checks month after month after month.

All of this means that since Halloween, the Frema-Useless Clutter household has shelled out no fewer than six thousand dollars on extracurricular activities, food, and gas.

This figure makes me want to vomit a little bit in my mouth. Meanwhile, the staff members at Chase Bank, U.S.A. probably received one hell of a Christmas bonus.

Things aren't as bleak as I make them out to be. For one, we don't charge anymore than we can pay off in full each month, so we're not paying any interest on our balances. Two, I received a handsome bonus of my own, which covered the extravagent clothing and shoe purchases, and three, we've still managed to set aside a respectable amount in savings and up my HSA contribution, so we're not hit too hard by all the future dental work (my implant is scheduled for Friday morning, and I'm trying really hard to avoid mental images of the doctor drilling a hole into my gum and placing a metal post in it. Ice cream helps). All three of our bank accounts are strong and healthy. We are very lucky.

But we're also having a hard time getting ahead. The Cobalt will not be paid off by February, and we've already made peace with residing in this apartment until 2008 because of our desire to obtain a mortgage that won't be too different from our rent, which requires saving a down payment of at least ten percent. As for the car? We'll continue to cross our fingers and limit its excursions to Luke's office commute; since his job is a whopping eight minutes from where we live, it should hold on at least another full year.

When discussing our house plans over Christmas with my lovely sister, who's currently mulling over similar home-ownership issues with her own husband, she revealed that she and Dan hope to have something this summer, fall at the latest. "You two make more money than we do," she said. "You shouldn't have any trouble getting into a place."

She's right. If we wanted to, Luke and I could start house-hunting today and fork over the dough for closing costs without batting an eye. We could find a cute little two-story ranch with three bedrooms and a yard and that white picket fence I mentioned eight paragraphs up. We could shop at Bed Bath & Beyond for new bathroom towels and a kitchen table that seats more than two people and then we could head on over to La-Z-Boy for a sleeper sofa in an effort to encourage more overnight guests. We're not rich, but we're doing well. It wouldn't break us.

As long as I work.

And therein lies the problem. Before Luke accepted his job, we were living on my salary. His salary is less than mine. If we wanted to live on it and pay all the bills we're paying right now, it would be really freakin' hard. And that's without a baby and a mortgage.

I know there might be a possibility I have to work once I pop out a kid. As much as I want to stay home, if Luke were having an especially hard time meeting our basic needs--and I'm talking food, heat, and insurance, not TiVo, an extra car, or hair appointments--there's no way I could let him bear the weight alone, not when my student loans make up such a large percentage of our debt and I could do something to make things better. However, we've agreed to give it a shot, and we're both nervous about what it'll be like to sustain three people on his income, so we're doing our best to make our goal as attainable as possible.

In my New Year's post, I mentioned the possibility of teaching a blogging class at my undergraduate alma mater in the fall. I think about what it would mean if that possibility materialized into an offer, and I wonder if I would be any good. If I am any good, I wonder if I would ever be invited to teach within the English department on a part-time basis, enabling me to stay home with my children the majority of the time and still bring in some money doing something I know I'd love. I wonder how long I'll have to wait for an answer. My professor friend e-mailed me three days before Christmas and the waiting is already killing me.

In keeping with my resolutions, I continue to remember no matter when we pay off our car, no matter when Luke carries me over the threshhold of our first home, we are still very blessed. Blessed to make the money we do, and have the savings we do, and opportunities we do. We have a home and food and health insurance. We have all of our fingers and all of our toes. We have lots of blankets to keep us warm at night. And we have hope, which thankfully, is free.

P.S. It's De-Lurking Week! Don't forget to say hi.

Comments

[CPA Mom]

Thank God hope is free. That makes us millionares. 'Cause otherwise, we are dirt poor.

[Dawn]

It's amazing how easy it is to fritter away money on unplanned expenses, isn't it? Anyhow, you two are young, and I commend you for waiting until you're completely in the financial place you need to be before house-hunting and getting knocked up. And, while you haven't made as much progress as you may have wanted to, you haven't taken any steps backwards, which is huge. Just keep on keepin' on, and you kids will get there eventually.

[kelley]

I've got a notepad on my desk right now, filled with MLS listings that I've jotted down. Needless to say, we've also been doing a lot of number crunching and picket fence dreaming. (And we also have plenty of take-out dinner financial remorse...)

[Stacey]

Pulling for you and that cool job!

I don't even want to think about how much money I pissed away on Starbucks, earrings, and movie rentals this year. We all do it!

[Audrey]

It sounds to me like you guys are being really responsible financially. I, too, dream of being able to stay home with my kids, working freelance from home (and maybe part-time away from home).

Keeping my fingers crossed for you and that cool job!

[Liz]

We don't always get exactly what we want, but it does help to remember all we have.

I'm feelin' this post. :)

[Molly]

Oh how I feel your pain. Ohhhhh how I feel your pain...

Just move up here. We'll split a duplex.

[Silly Hily]

I go back and forth every single day with the choices I have made. Sometimes I beat myself up and think one way, other times I am thankful and think another way.
I think you and Luke are being very smart. I think the whole "you will never be financially ready for children" saying has some truth to it but it doesn't hurt to try your best to be ready does it?
I hope things easily fall in line for you in 2007. That way I can read a "We are finally READY" post from you.

[Emily]

I'm headed into Financial Nightmare 2007 as of Friday! Whoo hoooo! We'll see if Dave and I survive through Budget Hell!

And hey, if you need tips? I just posted about this on Friday and got GOBS of advice. Good advice, too!

[Lindsey]

What a great post! I completely share your agony when it comes to money. I feel like every time my savings account starts to look halfway decent, my car decides to be disagreeable and I end up forking over at least $500-$1,000. We have a house, which is nice, but Edgar's family helped us out a lot to get it. I think about how the next house we live in I want to be so much nicer than the one we have now. How the hell can I do that if we barely save a dime? Edgar has some credit card debt, plus student loan s that he will be paying off f-o-r-e-v-e-r. I just don't know how some people do it. We are trying though, and like you said, we have hope. AND LOVE!

[Lindsey]

Oh yeah, and I am so with you on the even number thing. I hope Edgar proposes in 2007 so we can actually get married in 2008...perhaps. :-) I hate that I was born on 10/16/81 because the 81 ruins it. I think about weird things like that too. It's part of the OCD.

[daddy d]

Good Job in thinking through everything. You have the whole range of possibilites covered. Living on one wage in a great idea. If you can do that a large percentage of the time even better. Truth about money is that it is kinda like work. Work time can and will fill up any time you give to it. Any amount of money can be spent with very little effort. Keeping positive is the main thing to do.

[Art Nerd]

Le sigh. I feel for you, ms. frema. I also want a house, so badly. We need it, we need our own space. I'm kind of glad that I already know I'll be working at least part time when we have kids, because I think that the disappointment in the fact that I couldn't (if I wanted to, which I don't, but you know) would be very hard to take.

Opportunities could be right around the corner. And I think it's okay to want, as well. Makes us stronger, and all. bleh.

[Jen]

My husband and I are/were in the same type of situation the past few years. We already had the house (we jumped on that about 3 yrs ago when we were both planning on working for a while and he got a nice fat raise at work!) but still had 2 car payments, 2 student loans, PLUS grad school tuition (which wasn't even the full amount because of his work helping and I worked at the University- HUZZAH! DISCOUNT!) But yeah. We *could* have done the kid thing... but only if I worked. And with him in school, forget it. We were making decent money and were able to buy things we wanted without going into credit card debt (MY BIGGEST FEAR.) but my paychecks wouldn't cover day care AND leave much to bring home.. so it just didn't make sense.

That's pretty much why I decided to try my hand at freelance web design in my 'spare' time. I wasn't sure how it would go, but I knew that if I didn't give it a shot, I'd always wonder. And if it didn't work out, at least I tried! Then we'd revisit things and see if we had any other great ideas. THANKFULLY, God is good! And these past 2 years, I've been blessed with much success with my little business (not without a lot of work and tears and stress, of course! hehe) but I've loved every minute of it. And now it's giving me the opportunity to stay at home with our daughter (due in 3 months!) and I get to do what I love in my pajamas. You freakin' kidding me? WOOHOO!

So I guess this is my little cheerleading post for you :) By all means, pursue the teaching thing- even if this particular one falls through, maybe there are others out there? And I remember you mentioning freelance writing as well... that's something you can give a try without investing all that much cash up front (you've already got a great blog here for your portfolio!) I'm of the belief that nothing is ever handed to us and we have to make our own success. So go for it :) :) We'll all be here, cheering you on!

(wow that last paragraph sounded REEEEAAALLLY cheesy, but you know what I was trying to say, heh)

[VirginiaGal]

My husband & I will be married 5 years in March & still no kidlets (was 30 this year, so there went my mental plans to have at least one while I was still 20's). We do have a fabulous 3000+ sf house in the 'burbs; 2 suvs, cause we live in the hilly 'burbs; and a small vacation condo at a ski resort. Can I be a SAHM and keep the vacation condo? Probably not unless we rent it during the time we would want to use it ourselves. Can we live on my husbands salary alone without killing our savings? Not without selling the condo or renting it as per above. Regardless, we are going to start trying this year...my biological clock has started ticking louder, trumping financial issues.

You're doing good kiddo. Financial planning is like weight-loss, sometimes you slip off the plan. Figuring out where you went wrong and then moving on with the original (modified) plan is much better then throwing it out the window altogether. You will get there.

Sorry for the book. I believe I am delurking with this post. Also wanted to say "I heart Tragic Love Fridays".

[Isabel]

What a great post. I agree with the other comments that the fact that you guys are thinking ahead is so smart.

Things will work out. They always do.

And understanding that you ARE blessed is so great. I forget that myself often, but then I see my sweet baby or look at my hard-working husband and am reminded that I AM blessed. And I am thankful for my blessings. I didn't get them for being a good person. I got them from having Faith. (Or at least that's my belief.)

Happy BIRHTDAY and Happy Delurking Week.

[Bethiclaus]

hi

[Chris]

Happy Delurking Week!!!