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February 09, 2007


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Now that I got that out of my system, I will leave a real comment in the morning. The real morning, I mean, that does not involve 1:30am right now.

I just wanted to beat Sant and Silly Hily to the punch...even if I DID have to coax Sant out of the computer chair after she'd already read and started a comment.


Low you son of a bitch! I was already signed in and everything!

Now onto what is your first REAL comment on this installment of TLF (provided Silly Hily's midnight alarm failed to go off and she doesn't beat me to the post:)

Ahem-- who called it?! I knew that she'd be off her rocker with stolen goods in no time. So funny, I can just imagine the meeting Jenna had with Kayla that day, like the phone conversations your mind wanders out of and then back again, realizing that you should at least "mmhmm" in agreement-- I mean hey, you don't want to be rude.

Back to the baby-napping (I feel the need to decipher this from kidnapping on the recent clarification made by my four-year-old nephew that I babysit his brother, I kidsit him)-- so can I just say that this was one of my favorite entries of Frema's comments ever! I could totally see all of this going down, and the only thing left out of the scenario was Jenna's black baret (a detail unlike her fiber intake, that was carelessly left out!)

I realize that she is a teenager, and that photos were provided, but I could not help myself from picturing Jenna's make-over to unveil her as an American Girl doll. Forgive me.

Also, I was a bit concerned about the Britney Spears she was pulling, and because she is not from the South (not even the South side as a technicality), she should watch herself as she makes her escape to Canada!!!

Yes, that's what I said-- okay, hopefully her short education has taught her more about geography than it did about birth control-- LEAVE THE COUNTRY. Especially with a stolen baby in tow. Although, being that the prison leaves their nursery (of 20 babies?? That's a whole lotta mothers behind bars... a little like MADD, but MBHB, you pickin up what I'm throwin down?) open and attended by only my sister's gym sitters...

FOCUS! Okay, my only guess is that she will leave minimally the state, but hopefully the country, where we will revisit mother and (stolen) daughter six years from now, with Kayla's release!!!

Sidenote-- I also gasped out loud when you revealed the number of pages left in your masterpiece, albeit, with a sequal, but every week I wonder how much more-- and that you better get back to work!!!:D

Gah, how I loved Melrose Place.

I am thrilled that there are 27 pages left...you just don't know how I look forward to Fridays.

I nominate Frema to run a SuperMax prison! I feel like I'm reading about Oz!

Unlike some of your other crazy readers (pointing finger above at first two comments), I'm peacefully sleeping at 2:30 in the morning. 2:30 to tha A.M. ladies! Yall be crazy. (What am I talking about? I'm totally jealous. Oh well, I guess I'll have to make up for it by leaving 20 comments all by my little self.)

Now, where was I? Oh, here's how it's gonna go down. Jenna is going to drive to the south where we all drive around with our kids on our laps instead of in car seats. She must do this as quickly as possible though so she's going to strap a diaper, on herself, so she doesn't have to stop to use the bathroom. Then, she's gonna board a plane and fly to the Bahamas and get a new birth certificate for Katherine(lynn) and list herself as the mother and David as the father.

For some reason, the whole "changing identity" thing made me think of the Days of Our Lives subplot where Elaine Davidson (how scary is it that I still know her name) played three characters...one was a nun or something?? Wasn't there a baby involved in that too?

Does the sequel have chapters where Katherine narrates? Now THAT would be interesting...:)

But wait, it doesn't stop there. Here's my sequel. Then Kayla's going to file a lawsuit against her claiming that she's Katherine(lynn)'s mother. But Bahama law will protect Jenna. Then, the state of CA is going to get all up in the business and order a maternity test. Then, Mikey Mike is going to come in and say that HE is the baby daddy, not David. Since David's dead, his family is going to have to fight this custody battle.
It's gonna get ugly before it gets pretty. But eventually, Jenna and Kayla both die of a TrimSpa overdose. Michael will sue TrimSpa, marry Cassie, and raise Katherine(lynn).

And I'm spent.

I got so caught up in TLF that I forgot to ask something that has me just as excited. Are we really going to get to read entries from your diary? Because that would be so cool.

"grade A boobies", LMAO!! It just gets more and more exciting and nail biting each week!!! Can't wait for next Friday. And, gah, your comments are hilarious.

One question though, how, if the nurse's head was on the door, did Jenna open the door and go in without waking her? Damn that Jenna is good!

Yep, that Britney moment wouldn't fly on today's television. UNLESS they made a very celeb-referential Law-and-Order style teaching moment out of it and she got snapped by a photographer doing a story on "Safety Don'ts" for Redbook Magazine and she was published (with the black bar over her eyes) in the next month's issue, which Kayla later sees in the prison reading room and is how they discover what happened to the baby.

I got a kick out of picturing her climbing stairs with a big butcher's knife stuffed down her pants.

I'm wondering at Jenna's need to go to the salon to cut her hair, she could've just chopped it off at home! That way, no one would've seen her at all.
And were her parents sleeping at 10:00pm again?!?
Regardless, that Jenna is a smart crazy. Suggesting the guard should get back to his post? Pulling the menstrual card on the way out? Pure [evil] genius.

She read your diary? And you wrote DETAILED descriptions of having sex?

I'm cringing for you!

Okay, so there is an infant wing and a prison nursery? Dude, that is one crazy ass State Prison.

And she bought bottles and formula but no car seat?! What was she thinking? (She was thinking "how can I sneak this butcher knife into the State Prison without anyone noticing?" Because dude, that is easier than I would have thought.)

Dyed red hair looking natural? That's the least plausible part of this story so far.
But we'll forgive Jenna for not choosing a more subtle color to dye her hair for puling the menstrual card. I didn't learn that little trick until I got pulled over for speeding. So cliched... and yet it works every. damn. time.

I guess Jenna's smuggling the knife in her pant leg looked about as natural as when my friends and I used to smuggle snapple bottles full of vodka into concerts by shoving them in our pants. And no one caught us, either!

(oh, and the diary? I got busted the same way. My mom not only confirmed my anorexia but also got to read a sordid detail of my deflowering, as well as several tales of underage drinking and frightening promiscuity. Afterwards, while I was writing about how much being grounded SUCKED, I wrote a note that said "MOM: DO NOT READ THIS. I AM SERIOUS. IT IS A VIOLATION OF MY PRIVACY AND I WILL NEVER TALK TO YOU AGAIN" and rubberbanded it to the front. Yea... that'll stop her, idiot).

Good thing Jenna has a car & unlimited access to $. Otherwise Michael would have just stepped in with some sort of stolen car, fake mustache/bad fake ID scenario (he's so dreamy).

Those prison mommas must have some sweet conjugal trailer out back, because 20 BABIES? Nice.

And how did your Mom expect you to learn about doin'-it if she's going to edit all your movies? Come on Mom!

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  • "The Lord is my helper,
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