Because when I returned to work last March, I was lucky enough to score a boss who does stuff like this:
Tomorrow is my 29th birthday. It's also the day she and I are visiting a printer from out of town, so she brought my goodies in today. In addition to the breakfast extravaganza, there were gift cards to Subway, White Castle, and the double-D chain itself. Is there a better way for a woman who's 35 weeks pregnant to celebrate her birthday? I think not.
When Luke and I decided that he would stay home with our children and I would handle the corporate eight-to-five, I was happy we could manage on one income but devastated that I had to make it happen. I know the old saying, "Where there's a will, there's a way," but believe me when I tell you Luke's salary was not appropriate for his experience and qualifications and could not support the two of us in our apartment, let alone a baby and a house. (Thank you, non-profit sector.) At the end of my maternity leave, I cried every day because I was so sad about all the moments I'd be missing with my beautiful baby daughter. I was also very nervous about working with a new boss, someone who was hired days before I left, someone who I was afraid would either replace me or ask me to downplay my role as a mother for "the good of the company."
Instead, I met a person who was kind, caring, secure in her ability to lead our department, and open to my suggestions and ideas. She listens to my stories about Kara and Luke, and she came into my office with tears in her eyes after watching the YouTube montage of Kara's first year. We gab about All My Children and the suckfest that is DISH Network. She never asks me to compromise my family time for work but appreciates when I do. And we are extremely productive and well-respected by all of our colleagues. It's the best of both worlds. It's the reason I'm OK with rushing through breakfast, throwing on my coat, and waving "bye-bye" to Kara, who would much prefer me to stick around for an eighth reading of Numbers or At the Zoo.
I won't lie to you. Sometimes, it's still hard. Kara is so much fun these days--pushing her babydoll stroller around the living room but refusing to chauffeur the actual baby; "hiding" under the end table just waiting for someone to find her. Last night, she enjoyed her first 100-percent big-girl dinner of spaghetti, applesauce, and whole milk. (Can I take a minute to brag that she was off Similac after only three days of half-and-half bottles? Benjamins, welcome back!) And when I'm putting her to bed, she'll pull up my shirt to give my belly a kiss no fewer than three times a night. Absolutely adorable. I wish there were more hours in the day for me to get more of those kisses.
But I don't have the mommy guilt I thought I would. I know now that we can and do make the most of the time we have together. I know Kara thrives in countless ways from spending her days with Luke. I know I make a difference at my company. And hot damn, am I proud of myself for being able to provide for my family.
Happy Birthday to me.
Happy Birthday Bree! (early)
Love to all!
Love and Kisses,
AD
Posted by: Diane | January 08, 2009 at 09:49 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Posted by: Trilby | January 08, 2009 at 10:05 AM
A very happy birthday to you, and a hearty congrats as well for being able to bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan! Your family is very blessed!
Posted by: Erika | January 08, 2009 at 10:21 AM
What an AWESOME boss!!
I live about an hour south of Indy and have seriously considered looking for a job up there. We have a fairly high cost of living because of the university in town but not the wages to match. I would hate an hour commute but I know so many people that find something like that to be as common as my 15 minute commute. Oh well.
Happy early b-day! I'll be turning the big 2-9 on the 18th and can't wait. Yay for January birthdays!
Posted by: Brandy | January 08, 2009 at 10:23 AM
Happy Birthday to you indeed!
What a great boss. Those donuts are making me drool. The ONLY local DD is undergoing renovations, so has been closed for what seems like forever. Thank goodness my husband passes an outpost version on his way to work so we can get some, even if they are on the older side.
Posted by: Mrs. Higrens | January 08, 2009 at 10:37 AM
Happy Birthday!
I think you have got a good set-up going with work and Luke taking care of the Kara (and brother here soon). And your boss seems very cool!
Posted by: AJU5's Mom | January 08, 2009 at 10:46 AM
Happy Birthday! An awesome boss makes it so much easier. Have a great day.
Posted by: Erica | January 08, 2009 at 10:49 AM
Happy Birthday! And you are SO lucky to have found a great boss, that is fantastic.
Posted by: Jen | January 08, 2009 at 10:56 AM
Happy, Happy Birthday!
Posted by: Nic | January 08, 2009 at 11:06 AM
Happy, happy birthday!
I've been reading you since before you were married and I'm so happy you guys having come so far! It's been fun reading about your journey.
Posted by: elizabeth | January 08, 2009 at 11:44 AM
Happy Birthday fellow '80 baby!!
Wishing you the best on what I'm sure will be a very busy and fulfilling year!
Posted by: r+k+mama | January 08, 2009 at 01:40 PM
Happy Birthday!!!
Posted by: Liz | January 08, 2009 at 03:57 PM
First of all - happy birthday - and second of all - that is is so sweet!
:)
Posted by: Becky (StinkyLemsky) | January 08, 2009 at 03:57 PM
Happy birthday!!
Any job openings there? ;)
Posted by: Bethany | January 08, 2009 at 04:26 PM
happy, happy birthday! (I had forgotten, but our bdays are one day apart! that's cool to me because I am 12 years old!)
If it's not to creepy to say this, I'm sort of PROUD of you for making this all work, and doing it so well. You're impressive, lady.
Posted by: Operation Pink Herring | January 08, 2009 at 04:54 PM
Happy birthday, Frema! 29 is such a great age.
Your boss sounds awesome. She had me at Dunkin Donuts!
Kara and Dean had the exact same dinner last night. How happy are you to kiss Similac goodbye forever!?!??!
Posted by: Jen L. | January 08, 2009 at 04:54 PM
How awesome of your boss!! Happy Birthday a day early, friend. I'm so glad that you guys are happy and well.
Posted by: Molly | January 08, 2009 at 05:44 PM
Happy Birthday!!!! It sounds like you are in a really great place in your life. Sure, there will be trials and tribulations, but I always love that you never fail to count your blessings.
Posted by: Lindsey | January 08, 2009 at 07:31 PM
You are truly blessed. :)
Posted by: Roxanne | January 09, 2009 at 12:28 AM
Happy birthday!
Posted by: Sarah | January 09, 2009 at 04:14 AM
Happy Birthday from a fellow Capricorn (12/28)! I'm so glad your family found a way to make everything work. Luke must be a very special person. I think it's wonderful!
Posted by: Lynne | January 09, 2009 at 08:00 AM
Happy Birthday. Great post. I hope you have a great day, you deserve it.
Posted by: Keri | January 09, 2009 at 09:36 AM
Happy Birthday! I'm glad you have a great situation that works for you and your family.
Posted by: Fraulein N | January 09, 2009 at 01:07 PM
Happy birthday, Bree (from another Brie)! Enjoy year 29!!
Posted by: Brie | January 09, 2009 at 03:59 PM
Happy Birthday to you dear daughter. :)
Posted by: Molly | January 10, 2009 at 09:59 AM
Happy Birthday. Your the best. Love and joy.
Posted by: daddyd | January 10, 2009 at 08:04 PM
Happy belated birthday, I hope is was great! I just wanted to comment on your parents blog here because I am not registered there. I don't know if you aleady know this, but Swistle gives great naming advice, and she has her readers vote and comment on name suggestions (www.swistle.blogspot.com) then just scroll down to the link to the baby names site on the right column. Though, I think with your criteria, Aaron would be a good name, and perhaps Jamesfor a middle name? Then you would have:
Kara Leigh
Aaron James
Just a suggestion, have a great day!
Posted by: Tess | January 11, 2009 at 12:51 PM
Happy Belated Birthday Kiddo!!! Drop me a line sometime and let me know how it went.
Love you tons!!!
Posted by: Trina | January 13, 2009 at 08:23 AM