Ready for take-off

When you are the parents of a spirited fifteen-month-old and slightly crazed ten-week-old and you can barely keep up on your laundry or the bills or the mountains of dishes mating in your sink or even sleep for longer than four hours at a time, it's easy to let a trifle of a day like Easter slide right under your radar. You know, the day Jesus rose from the dead? Totally a Hallmark holiday anyway, right?

(Just kidding. So sorry, Jesus.)

Even though I do think we're getting better at managing our household and this new family dynamic, it's still way too easy to get so caught up in our day-to-day routine that we forget about the big picture, the issues that make up the fabric of our lives (and you thought it was cotton!). This is the first time in several years that I didn't at least attempt to do something extra during Lent, and we gave little thought to how we would introduce Kara to the concept of Easter. On a smaller scale, we didn't even talk about coloring eggs until yesterday, when Luke asked the question and I shot him down, focused on the mess we would make instead of the joy Kara would take from the activity. We just have so much mess these days that I hesitated to make more. "Next year," I promised him. "We'll do it next year."

We did have the wherewithal to make an Easter basket for the kids, but when you're shopping for items the day before, your choices are somewhat limited. Since we knew the Targets and Wal-Marts would be packed with last-minute shoppers like us and since we planned on boycotting candy this year, anyway, we went to Barnes and Noble to pick up some books and other non-edible goodies for our clan. Kara and Nathan each received a God-themed book and a few other things that we crammed into a bag we already had at home, a fun bag that a girlfriend of mine bought for me to store nursing accessories back when I was pregnant with Kara, a bag I didn't use at all with her and only a few weeks with Nathan, a bag I loved nonetheless for its bright colors and various pockets. The Frog and Toad dolls we found in the children's section fit perfectly right up front. The bunny you see was a token present we bought for Kara at a Cracker Barrel two weeks ago on our way home from Merrillville, but we stuffed that in the bag, too. You know, in honor of the day.

 

Luckily, our hodge podge pseudo basket went over just fine. We've already read My Little Book About God three times to Kara, who adores her Frog and Toad dolls, and well, neither she nor the boy had the slightest clue what today was, anyway, so really we could've done nothing and they would've been none the wiser.

Nathan turned ten weeks old yesterday, and even though I'm trying to cut myself some slack and not sweat the small stuff, I'm ready to move past the minutiae we're currently entrenched in and get on with our lives. I hate that our day is filled with maintaining the status quo in terms of laundry, dishes, and bills. I want to get back to long-term financial planning; home improvement; phone calls with friends; baby books and photo albums; books of my own to read; more time for writing; trips to the zoo; family vacations; hell, even long walks as an after-dinner staple instead of a special occasion when we're not too tired would do for now. I want us to make a place for ourselves in this new community we worked so hard to find. I want get involved with good causes, Luke and I both, so we can meet new people and make friends. I want to lose this effing baby weight and pay closer mind to what we're putting in, on, and around our bodies. And somewhere in the middle, I want to spend one-on-one time with my husband.

(That, actually, is already in the works. For our anniversary next month, Luke and I have booked a night in southwest Michigan and made plans with his parents to watch the kids while we enjoy an adults-only getaway. We won't even be gone a full twenty-four hours--Saturday afternoon to Sunday morning, tops--but I'm already so excited I can't see straight.)

I know that the time and energy I need to accomplish all those things aren't too far off. The older the kids get, the easier it will be to focus on more than one or two things at a time. And this is such a special time in our lives that the last thing I want to do is wish Kara's and Nathan's early years away. I love them so much, just the way they are. But after being in the pregnancy/baby grind for literally two years now, I'm ready to broaden my horizons a bit. I'm ready to see what my awesome little family is capable of--what I'M capable of. And sometimes, I'm tired of waiting.

 

Not that I don't LOVE getting up at 3 a.m. for this sweet litle face.

Comments

[AJU5's Mom]

Okay, the only things in AJU5's basket where empty plastic eggs and two balls. I thought about putting the candy/fruit snacks in as well, but I didn't get around to it. She didn't seem to care. She enjoyed pulling the eggs out and then putting them back in. We didn't dye eggs- I wasn't quite ready for the mess (and I was pretty sure she would drink the liquid). So, with two, I think you are doing great!

[Jen L.]

Oh, my God, he's so beautiful! I loved the pics of Kara hugging him in the last post, by the way.
We did a similar Easter basket. I threw some fruit snacks, plastic eggs, a monkey puppet, some Little People and a book into a bucket for Dean. He was very interested in the paper grass and the plastic eggs.
I'm so glad you're getting some time away with Luke! Marcus and I have already declared a "Marjen Day" during our big family vacation this summer. CANNOT WAIT!

[Grandma Molly]

Next to the basket that you and Luke made for Miles and me two years ago, that is the best Easter basket. The Frog and Toad dolls are so cute, but of course Nathan is even more precious.

[Molly]

I had thoughts in my head until you posted the picture of That Adorable Boy at the end. Look at how sweet he is!!!

It is funny that you say all this, because just last night I was falling apart to Kevin over the monotonous, absolutely exhausting repitition that is my current daily life. I don't know if I want to wish the baby older or wish that I had more hands, more time, or what, but I do so hear what you're saying, friend. On with it. :o)

[Joanne]

I didn't do any Easter basket at ALL, for my 3 year old OR my one year old. In my defense, neither of them really know that it's Easter - the 3 year old is autistic and not that down with the concept of holidays or gifts yet and the one year old is - well, one and also kind of ignorant to it. Also I'm due in four weeks with the third and I just couldn't stand the thought of it.

I could NOT agree with you more about the drudgery and monotony that is our lives with little ones. Of course we love them and they're perfect, etc., etc., but let's face it - it sucks to be without sleep and it sucks to be covered in food and (God help us) worse all the time. It sucks to not ever say anything to your husband except "hand me that" or "grab her before she jumps off that thing" or whatever. It's boring and stupid but apparently, these are the GOOD YEARS and we will miss them! Hang in there, I hope we all get more rest soon, maybe spring weather will help - or at least the rain to stop, in Indianapolis today. :)

[Becca]

You are doing great! The first few months with two I just hung on for dear life. I finally feel some wiggle room now that my youngest is six months. But my house is still a disaster. Yours sounds so nice and orderly compared to ours!

[r+k+mama]

I so feel you on the Let's Just Get Past This-ness of life with young children. Bill and I were just talking about how even though this year was still stressful, we actually felt it was the first manageable holiday since we've had kids. Hang in there!

When Keaton hit about 4 months I NEEDED to do something Normal for myself. I picked up Rushdie's Midnight's Children from my bookshelf and swore to myself I would read it a few nights a week. In my sparse spare time I had just been reading or watching fluff and I needed to delve into something that required a different part of my brain than the one trained for wiping butts. It took about 4 months but I finished it and was so proud. It is now one of my favorite books and only part of that is the actual content- mostly because I pushed through and let myself enjoy something for ME during that incredibly demanding and monotonous time.
Also, love the Frog and Toad dolls!!

[daddyd]

The basket looks great. There was a lot of good stuff there for the two of them. Fun to unpack.

[Katie]

He is SO adorable!!!

"neither she nor the boy had the slightest clue what today was, anyway, so really we could've done nothing and they would've been none the wiser."

You know, if you don't introduce TV, you can keep this up until at LEAST kindergarten!!! OK, even though the thought is tempting, I haven't actually done that.

"But after being in the pregnancy/baby grind for literally two years now, I'm ready to broaden my horizons a bit."

I still want to have a big family, but sometimes, what you said sounds SO TEMPTING! I've put in 8 straight years of pregnancy and babies so far, and I expect I'll have another 12-15 or so, depending on how long my fertility holds out!

[Parsing Nonsense]

I think you two did great, and Kara and Nathan are ecstatic with what you did for them. Oh, he is just the most handsome little fellow, isn't he?

[Don]

Hey Bree...I've actually stumbled across your blog before (just never commented), and read it many times, it always makes me laugh. And both your kids are amazingly cute. I look forward to keep reading your blog from time to time.