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January 25, 2011


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What a great post. I think you did Kara's birthday justice. And your point about how you handle the situation being the most important is a good one. It's something that I think all parents struggle with.

I was raised a lot like you and wanted something different for my daughter. I really like Happiest Toddler on the Block and 1 2 3 Magic. They give great positive discipline techniques! Just a little assvice from a lurker. :)

Dealing with children does have exasperating moments, but you and Luke seem to be two of the best parents ever. You have a wonderful, reasonable, nonviolent approach to child-raising.

I always love watching the video. I think that Kara will have many fond memories of this last year.

Yes, another lurker...I think you handled everything just great, and if someone offered advice to me on how to restrain my child in public my biggest problem would suddenly be not exposing my children to the tongue-lashing language the busybody might receive. On the other hand, I usually let my two year throw himself on the floor and just stand there until he's done. I have no shame. :) Like the person above said, though, 1 2 3 works, we use it all the time. Good luck! Sara

Ooooo I hate unsolicited advice. But way to go on handling the tantrum. I find that one of the very hardest things about parenting. My daughter is 3 and a half and I just am never sure how I am supposed to handle every fit. Ignore or deal with? Time-out or loss of privelege? I keep hoping it will get better (just in time for the next kid to start the fits)

Also, I hate Hello Kitty as well, and I have the same sippy cup as the one I saw peeking in a picture.

Happy Birthday to your beautiful daughter! The video was awesome. What program does Luke use? I'm sure the unsolicited advice was the first of many, or maybe not the first? People need to take the advice I give to my daughter...Worry about yourself. :)

Three is different. The sassy attitude is what is getting us. That, and AJU5 would rather go to time out and do as we ask. So, we have resorted to spanking with a spoon (or similar item). Actually, normally we just have to threaten and she gets right to action. I wonder what 4 will bring...

3 is a whole different attitude! I am dealing with it on a daily basis and trying not to get angry. Telling mine that that is not the way you talk to your parents, it is ok to be upset and not want to do something, but the tone needs to change. Right before my sweet little 2 year old turned 3, the attitude showed up. I thought to myself neither one of us are going to make it to 4. For the most part she is a great little girl, but then there are the times that her attidtude shows up ( my hubby says it is all from me). I try to stay calm, but there are those days that it does not happen.

It sounds like you handled the situation in a great way. It is hard to stay calm in those situations. Wow on the lady telling you on how to restain your child! Brovo to you for not telling her off! Sounds like it was a lovely day with a little bit of a detour.

I love the video!

I loved the video! She surely is getting so grown up, and so much fun. I can't wait to get together again soon. (Which we need to pick a day for!)

Next year's party invitation will surely read: FYI- our family already has every sort of building block. Please consider other gifts. Hahaha

Well done for staying calm! That is what I'm currently striving for every day. Some days are going better than others!

I can't spank for one reason... I am ashamed enough that my daughter has learned to yell from me yelling at her. I can't live with teaching her to hit.

It's a thankless job, and then at the end of the day, there are the onlookers who feel the need to give advice. Or even simply look at you as if there are antennae growing from your butt, because YOUR kid happens to be the one having a tantrum.

This is a really excellent post; bravo for your insight and courage.

I'm really late but wanted to comment on how much this post resonates with me. I also grew up in a house of yelling, and my dad disciplined when he was angry, not particularly consistently, and my mom just didn't discipline at all. It is tough to go from that to a different model, a different mindset, and really be winging it based on books and blogs and the wisdom of friends. Just wanted to say that I totally get it, that feeling of winging it, and just hoping that we're doing the right thing.
The other part that hit home was about how intensely personal life with a 3 year old has become - conversations are meaningful! Your kid may even remember bits of being three forever!
Oh and the number of times I have thought of a "treat" for Megan and it has blown up like your build a bear day...many many many times. sigh.

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