I am 21 weeks pregnant today, and according to the plethora of baby books in existence, I should be at my prenatal peak: visibly showing but not enormous, increased energy levels, and only occasional bouts of round ligament pain. Go on and run that 5K! Hike your ass off! Enjoy these precious weeks of gestating freedom while you still can!
All of that may be the case for a first-timer or a gal who hasn't birthed 11- and 9-pound newborns, but these are not my truths.
After complaining of tenderness in my belly at my 15-week appointment, a quick exam from my ob/gyn revealed that I have a condition called diastasis recti, meaning that my rectus abdominal muscle has separated into two vertical halves. It's common among women who have endured multiple pregnancies and who have delivered larger-sized babies -- CHECK and CHECK -- and it's not anything I need to be concerned about in the long run (so I've been told, at least), but the doctor did say that the tenderness would remain present throughout the pregnancy and most likely increase in intensity. And oh shit, was she ever right.
I usually begin my day feeling perfectly normal, and if I were the sadistic type I could lightly pummel my stomach without suffering even the slightest twinge of pain. But by the end of the work day, the soreness has emerged from its bat cave, and come dinnertime the skin over my belly button is protruding something fierce, to the point that if it even lightly brushes up against another object of any kind, I am clutching my sides and sucking in my breath as if I've been kicked with a steel-toed boot. Even simple acts like sitting on the floor or repositioning myself on the couch have become seriously fucking unpleasant, and poor Luke has taken over the bulk of evening kitchen clean-up once again.
At my last two appointments, each doctor has recommended using a maternity belt to relieve some of the pressure, but I don't wear belts when I'm NOT pregnant because I hate the idea of having something so constricting touching my skin. However, the pain has gotten worse over the last several days, and even Luke is pushing me to look into this. Have any of you dealt with this condition before? If so, did a belt work for you? Any feedback on this would be much appreciated.
It doesn't even look like a typical pregnant belly, does it--all triangular and cliff-like? Plus, my hairstyle is making history by introducing what can only be described as the first front-facing mullet for women! to the modern American public. Clearly, the epitome of sexiness all around!
The saving grace throughout all of this has been Baby Brother's activity, which has been strong enough for weeks to feel at various points throughout the day, and oftentimes it is a welcome distraction from focusing on how uncomfortable I am. I'm already daydreaming about what he looks like, what he'll feel like, and what our lives will be like after we bring him home. Kara and Nathan have started incorporating mentions of Baby Brother in our daily conversations, so I think it's becoming a little more real for them, too.
Kara: Does Mommy and Daddy love you? (She revels in asking this question and poses it frequently throughout the day)
Frema: Yes, honey, Mommy and Daddy love you and Nathan very much.
Kara: And the new baby?
Frema: Yes, honey, and the new baby.
And we do. We really, really do.
I've been a lurker since about the time Kara was born - I love your blog. I'm a physical therapist, and while I don't do this myself, physical therapists who specialize in women's health might be able to help you (both now and after your baby is born). There is a feature on the web page of the American Physical Therapy Association to help you find a nearby physical therapist who has expertise in women's health issues. If you are worried about the expense, you could at least call to talk with the physical therapist to see if she can help and if she could minimize the number of appointments you would need. The link to the Find a PT page is below. Good luck!
http://www.apta.org/applications/findaptsearch/search2.aspx
Posted by: Laura | February 22, 2011 at 09:45 PM
I have no practical knowledge on this, only theoretical, but I believe a belt will help you. They have belts designed to help support the load of the baby, which will take some of the pressure off your skin. (The reason your having pain is, with your abdominal muscle split like that, your skin is under a LOT more strain than usual because your muscle isn't doing the work to support the belly, because of the split down the middle.)
If your insurance will cover it, I second Laura's recommendation to see a PT. They can get you into the right belt for you and can also help you with some exercises to mitigate the pain. (Maybe. They can definitely hook you up with post-partum exercises to help it resolve once you've delivered.)
I hope it gets better, for that does not sound like an awesome time.
Posted by: Dawn | February 23, 2011 at 08:41 AM
I third the belt idea. I bet if you put it on early in the day, before you feel super-tender, its light pressure and support will feel good/lessen the pain by evening.
Also, I think you look gorgeous. Healthy and glowing, with a beautiful head of hair. :)
Posted by: Must Be Mom | February 23, 2011 at 09:55 AM
I loved my belt. It lifted and relieved some pressure - especially with my first when I had to work through the whole pregnancy (barfing all the way).
Posted by: jessica | February 23, 2011 at 12:46 PM
When I was pregnant with Keaton, at about 35 weeks I was experiencing shooting pains in my abdomen. On the way to the appointment to get them checked out I fell down the stairs and landed myself in L&D to be monitored for two days. Both Keaton and I were fine but they did send me home with a belt which I was not excited about but I ended up actually liking the firm hold/light pressure it had on my belly and wore it for the last two weeks of my pregnancy. I hope you can find something that will ease the pain- seeing a PT isn't a bad idea.
Posted by: rkmama | February 23, 2011 at 01:38 PM
You look gorgeous! I've never worn a belt while pregnant, but I could see where it might help. Sorry you are in pain. That is no fun. Hang in there.
Posted by: Erica | February 23, 2011 at 02:42 PM
I didn't have that condition and I also hate belts but my maternity belt SAVED me. My daughter was breach from early on and as she grew I had mild pubic separation because her growing butt was stuck low in my pelvis. In addition to that, I have my own hip problems. I was resistant to it especially having to undo it every time I peed! I only wish I had done it earlier. The constant discomfort on my hips/lower back/belly was GONE. I walked a mile a day to/from work and thought i couldn't endure another step until I bought it.
Mine was like $20 at motherhood maternity. Best $20 I have ever spent, seriously.
Posted by: Melissa | February 23, 2011 at 06:33 PM
Maybe that belt would help, would be my guess. It would be a tool to do a job that would support and help the fight with gravity as the day goes on.
Posted by: daddyd | February 23, 2011 at 06:41 PM
You really do look fantastic. I have had round ligament pain but never the pain you describe, and ... ouch! I have a friend who waitressed in Chicago at a super busy/fancy restaurant until, like, minutes before she had her baby and she wore a belt the last few months so she wouldn't waddle so much. Is it that it would be against your skin that bugs you? Because maybe you could wear a tank and maternity underwear (sexy!) and tuck it in and THEN put on the belt? I'd also third (fourth?) the checking on the PT thing. Why be in pain if you don't have to be?
Posted by: Joanne | February 23, 2011 at 06:46 PM
Yes! I used the Ultimate Maternity Belt, which I bought at Motherhood for less than 20 bucks!
http://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?Product_Id=973050113&MasterCategory_Id=MC32
I have virtually no waist, so I carried straight out-in-front. It was very uncomfortable. This thing took a lot of the pressure off and helped my sciatica.
I am so sorry you're dealing with this pain. I hope you find something to help you out!
Also, you're totally cute, mullet and all.
Posted by: Jen L. | February 23, 2011 at 07:50 PM
I didn't have a belt, but had these capris from lululemon that looked like they had boxers sticking out above the waistband, and that stretchy bit (which predictable advertised stupid lululemon) was amazingly supportive and comfortable, even for me, who also normally abhors belts. Also I am sure you're onto this already, but how about piling up the pillows whenever you lie down on your side, or bunching up a blanket there or whatever.
On a positive note - holy crap, more than halfway there, woo hoo!!!
Posted by: eva | February 23, 2011 at 11:18 PM